Will The Future Ever Change?, or Discouragement

Discouragement is fear that the future won't change, that what has happened and is happening will always happen. It is a lonely place. It feels like it needs to be dealt with alone; it makes it hard to let others close. It is dark and overshadows life to the point that there is no future, just an overwhelming sense of confusion, disappointment, and frustration.

When I was 9 or 10, I played in a big group violin concert in Salt Lake City. I played in the two easiest group pieces of the night, but I was rather proud of them. However, the last group of the concert, which included a little boy very much younger than me, played the 3rd movement of Mendelssohn's Violin Concerto in E minor. It is one of my favorite pieces; it's fast, beautiful, and terribly difficult. As we rode home in the van, I can still remember how terribly discouraged I felt. I felt like I had been left behind, that my violin playing was worthless. I thought of giving up violin altogether. Certainly I would never be able to play anything like that piece. Ever. 

My parents helped me through my discouragement and I didn't give up the violin. And I'm glad I didn't.  However, as I've grown up and gone through serious situations which have left me feeling deeply discouraged, I've certainly had thoughts of "nothing will ever change." But, I've learned from my own experience that allowing the Lord to be with me as I am and as I feel truly helps me calm down and see things clearly. Lots of times He hasn't changed what's going on. But He often reminds me of the Plan of Salvation and how this life is a time of education, how trials are essential facilitators of that education, and how I have a Savior who does help me and strengthen me and understand me and pick me up and help me keep going. Or, God will simply validate my pain or remind me how much He loves me.

Though it can be hard to remember, it's ok if God has helped us with a certain problem before and we are again afraid or sad or discouraged about it. God never gets annoyed or tired of helping us.

Giving up is not the only option when we face discouragement. Turning to our Heavenly Father over and over and over again through honest prayer, and trusting again and again that His true desire is actually for us to be happy, and accepting that He really does have a perfect personal plan for us puts us in a place where we can accept the solace and perspective we need. We can hold onto God with our trust (faith), even though we are down. God will never give up on us. Never. Even if our commitment gets a little soggy. If we will just hang on to Him,  He will lead us back into the light.